Monday, November 30, 2009

Trying on Shoes

I don't know if you're like me, but when shoe shopping, I find that I drift towards the same kinds of shoes. For me it's not too fancy, not too flashy-- maybe fun, probably cute, but most of all practical.

I have shoes on my mind tonight because I was thinking of how different shoes make us feel. How shoes can change a person. Cinderella. Elle on Legally Blonde. Forest Gump.

Remember that song, "these boots were made for walking, and that's just what they'll do. One of these days, these boots are gonna walk all over you."? When I see modern feminists do the stand-up-for-my-rights-at-all-costs thing, it comes across like this song. No matter who's hurt, no matter how it feels to others, no matter whether it's clearly wrong, I'm gonna put on these boots and doggone it, I'll walk where I please.

Then I thought about John the Baptist's assessment of himself in relation to Christ-- "I'm not even worthy to untie his sandal straps." He recognized Christ's supremacy... and it made him aware of his own role as lower than a servant.

Even though the first attitude is deemed laudable in our culture (particularly for women!), in God's economy, servanthood, self-control, putting others first, submission, giving honor to others, thinking of how others should be treated... these things are esteemed. For men and women. I don't often esteem them, but I want to.

I guess this here is my little confession for the night: I want to learn more about servanthood. I may not ever be what I ought to be, but by the grace from the Father and the inner working of the Spirit, He can make me more like Jesus-- the ultimate servant.

Today, we outwardly had a "successful" day. We made Christmas crafts, decorated the tree, and even had time to make and eat a really tasty cake. But too often, my attitude was cross and strained... and it poured over into what I saw reflected in the eyes and words of the kids throughout the day. I want to serve and love them as they ought to be loved.

I don't want to be the mom, the wife, or the woman who "stands up for my rights" first and foremost.... not that it's wrong to have rules or standards-- don't misread my words. But my attitude should be that of a servant. One who thinks of others' needs first.

Today I didn't do that. But by God's grace, tomorrow I get another shot. And with His help, I might just do better than I did today.


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